Volume Four Issue Eight

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  .../________________/       running on         mud.aus.sig.net 9999
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http://mud.aus.sig.net/                             ftp://mud.aus.sig.net/pub
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VOLUME FOUR, ISSUE EIGHT                                        April 1, 1997
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                                FROM THE IMPS
                        DEPARTMENTAL NEWS AND UPDATES

                               NEWS AND REPORTS
                             It's the Ether Bunny
                              Contest of Cunning
                                   
                              OPINIONS AND IDEAS
                         The LT Roving Reporter: Meets
                             Them Level 50 Blues
                    
                                  LEGENDITES
                 What the Bluebird of Happiness dropped on my desk?  
                          
                               LOVE LEGEND STYLE
                        A Scotch...er, Scottish Ceremony
                               A Modern Marriage
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Please send your responses to articles to the Legendary Times address at
[email protected]. Letters to the editor and submissions are welcomed.
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                               FROM THE IMPS

Imps Weekly Reports:

This week Ptah drastically updated writing on boards and notes to support
backing up, restarting, and some editing. He also helped run the Easter Egg
hunt, visited and talked shop at length with the imp of a mud Sabella found
(Exodus), and possibly lined her up as a speaker for the lecture series, and
caused another controversy with another post on pkill. :)

Kaige forwarded some admin email to Chocorua, updated building and testmud
docs to include new commands, coded acts for rooms and mobs (in_same_room if
conditional, empty_corpse and _get_all_corpse) in current and skilltrees code,
is still working on the clan-related commands including an "outcast" command
(again the MOTD will let you know when this code is added), and hosted
LegendMEET's BBQ and played chauffeur.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-                             
                       DEPARTMENTAL NEWS AND UPDATES

                                  CODING

Tad Worked on tailor, Ea worked on code to make faking info's harder, and got
a bulk mailer for the LT, Rufus did some bug fixing and troubleshooting, and
Gail coded the recall command for imms, worked on the warning stuff, and
worked on making some profiling changes, to help diagnose/detect mud lag,
Kaige coded some new stuff for mob acts, and worked on new clan commands.
 
                     =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
                                  BUILDING  
                                                      
Sabella spent the week working on Klien's hometown update as well as doing
research on other muds. Kaige continues to work on the Aztec update as well as
giving the builders a lot of new commands to work with. Rufus has been
occupying his time creating the new PR area, furthering the Ireland update and
working on the base area files' reconstruction, as well as making additions to
the code. LadyAce, though on vacation, has made progress in establishing her
area, the Crusades. Kheldar recently installed an update to Romania that fixes
many small bugs (those nasty time consuming ones) and has been doing various
under the table tasks and other fixes. Rusalka recently checked out Tudor
England from the running code base in order to start working on an update, and
Charity has started working on an abbey update as well as continuing work on
her new area. Wraith has been working diligently on the new generic mob
files. Leila is concluding work on a new recalltag arena, working on the
massive London update and has taken over the new PR.are file established
earlier this week by Rufus. Expect new treats, games and fun to come out of
this addition! Sandra keeps up with Salem and other areas by squashing bugs
and Joule has recently started working on her area 'officially.'

                     =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
                              PLAYER RELATIONS   
                                      
Many PR department members were at LegendMeet this last weekend, which may or
may not count towards "work" but was definitely an enriching experience (many
thanks to Ptah and Kaige for hosting us  :). Our regular work continues, which
includs strings, registrations, games, LT (Sabella and Leila), Trivia
(Croaker), Q and A (Spencer and Joule). Leila's been working on a new prize
machine, Croaker and Petal have been working on potential RP plots, Sandra's
been doing OOC offices, Flagg's been doing the Expie Ballots (be sure to
vote!!), Lirra's working on a RP workshop, Kheldar's been doing OOC library
stuff, ParticleMan's been working on web pages ideas (along with Sandra),
Rusalka continues to work on a possible ad, wrote up the weekly report
(surprise!), is working on some RP competition ideas, and submitted a couple
items for the LT this week.

PROMOTION!
    Everyone please congratulate Spencer on his recent promotion to full PR
    immort. Spencer does an excellent job of the weekly Question and Answer
    sessions (Wednesday nights at 8:00), as well as keeping up with on-line PR
    duties (games, description requests, strings etc.) Way to go, Spencer!!
   
                     =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
                               ADMINISTRATION
                               
As a whole we learned how to use the warn command, warned a few people for
some problems, and unfortunately deleted a character for cheating. The new
immorts are still getting used to commands on-line and on the mud-machine.
Many admins were available to answer questions, clan and unclan players, and
unpurge or check on save problems. Several also assisted PR in running various
games, and doing restrings. Aermid spent some time watching and listening as
other immorts dealt with various problems, and dealt with a multi-playing
problem. Baca handled some rules questions, and is still working out details
on the OOC library task. Chocorua e-mailed the sys admin regarding a problem
player, dealt with questions on the appropriate punishment for cheating in
recalltag (cheating in a game held on Legend is considered cheating on
Legend), and answered questions regarding a player's deletion. Govan kept an
eye on recalltag, while Leila spent some time working on admin-type additions
to the game (a flag that allows immorts to tag cheaters and prevent them from
joining for a period of time) and dealt with players with inappropriate names.
Sandra continues work on description requests and OOC offices. Solomon
continues to work on statistical data, as well as making suggestions for
helpfile and harassment policy and formats. Wraith checked for appropriate
posts on the board, and kept an eye on chat conversations.

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                              NEWS AND REPORTS
                              
  *Knock Knock* "Who's there?" "Ether" "Ether who?" "It's the Ether Bunny!!"

Kaige (with Ptah's assistance) ran her annual Easter Egg Hunt Sunday. Comments
such as "Where's the Easter Bunny?" and "I have 2000 eggs, so you might as
well give up," echoed across the mud for several hours. While Cadbury Cream
Eggs and other treats didn't count for the egg collection, several of us
filled our stomachs with a great deal of chocolate anyway :).

*Knock Knock* "Who's there?" "Lotta" "Lotta who?" "Lotta *more* Ether
Bunnies!"

Four Easter bunnies could be found giving out treats and hiding eggs around
Legend. Apparently one just couldn't get the job done fast enough. I'm sure
we'll find an egg or two that someone missed for several days to come. Tyche
won the hunt with 29 eggs. Runner-up was Beam with 6, and Merle and Binky
placed third with three each. Tyche won a multicolored string coupon for that
extraordinary collection, Beam got a color string, and Merle and Binky each
got a string coupon. Grats to all the winners!

*Knock Knock* "Who's there?" "Cargo" "Cargo who?" "Car go 'beep beep' and run
over ALL the Ether Bunnies :("

                              Massacre at Easter
The Immortal Easter Bunny was slain today on the docks of Bengal. Children
from throughout the world came to pay their last respects. A girl named Kaedon
said, "No yus na kill eastur bunny, he gives candy." Today was an upsetting
day on Legend...

But how was the bunny slain? The level 51 mob had apparently bled to death..
and we can only wonder who was the menacing surgeon who touched the childhood
hero with his scalpel...

Here is a live shot taken by Chopper9999.

    On a Wharf
    [Exits: n e s w]
    The corpse of the Easter Bunny is lying here.
    A ragged person, gender concealed by the layers of grime, is crying
    piteously here.

Reporting Live from the Scene: This is Landy MacLaren

*Knock Knock* "Who's there?" "Boo" "Boo Who?" "Aww, don't cry, the Ether Bunny
will be back again next year!"

                     =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
                       Cult of S Contest of Cunning!!!
                            
After observing the other mud citizens and staying quiet for an amount of
time, The Cult of S has decided to sponsor a contest that shall prove a point.
Our goal is to find the most ingenuous, cunning and of course the most
greedy person that a contest will allow. We shall be distributing tokens on
Friday 3pm to 8pm (mud/central time) April the 4th to every person who
requests one. The kind and obviously UNgreedy (bleh) immorts shall be helping
us distribute these tokens upon request. The winner of the contest shall
recieve a non-color string coupon and an invitation to join our cult (only
non-Angesley and non-Mcdougans may join of course). Here are the rules...

1.  Bribing, persuasion, trickery is all allowed and totally within bounds.

2.  Logging in alts to get more tokens is also allowed, as long as no multi-
    playing occurs.

3.  Looting the tokens from other players corpses _IS_ permitted, BUT.. no
    other looting is allowed of any kind as suggested in the LegendMUD rules
    and regulations. Let me make this clear, you are allowed to loot any and
    all tokens from ANYone's corpse who may have them, BUT not allowed to take
    anything else, including money, equipment or any other items as suggested
    in the normal rules.

4.  ONLY level 10 players and above may participate, therefore no player under
    level 10 may get tokens or win the contest. 

5.  Other rp clans are allowed to pool their tokens in order to win, due to the
    fact that it just proves our point about any such clan that would do such
    a thing.

6.  All characters may participate in this contest EXCEPT the ones in rule 4
    and myself or any of my alts.

Good hunting and godspeed, may you discover something about your fellow mud
citizens.
    - Ulric

Editor's Note: The immorts of Legend are happy to aid in the clan's rp, but
notes that the contestants MUST stay within the rules of LegendMUD (with the
exception of looting tokens as noted above). Getting unclanned players killed
for ANY reason is illegal and will result in administration action.

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                             OPINIONS AND IDEAS
                             
                           The LT Roving Reporter
                             by Leila, LT Staff

For those of us who were unable to attend the MudMeet in Austin, Texas, this
year, this week's Roving Reporter asks a few questions about the event and
gives us a small taste of what it was like. We started with the same question
for everyone, "What made you decide to go to the MudMeet?" and was met with
some varied responses.

[Leila] What made you decide to go to the MudMeet?
[Sharri] The chance to meet, face-to-face, some of the people I've come to
consider very good friends. =)
[L] Was it strange meeting people that you're friends with but haven't met?
[S] =) It was very cozy in many ways. You get to know a lot about people by
their actions, you get to "know" them without the visual clues.
[L] What was your overall impression? Did you have a good time? Would you go
again?
[S] I had a GREAT time, hope to see a few of these people again real soon, and
would do it again in a heartbeat.
[L] Which leads me to my last question, how come you haven't gotten together
before the meet?
[S] Good question. Only one I know of is 4 hours away, [and there was] never
really a good rallying cry to gather. [It's] hard for people to get together
usually. A Meet is a good inspiration, the chance to meet many people all at
once.

[Rufus] It was a kick, a little nerve wracking, but meeting people that you
already know is pretty darned cool. You never know what anyone's gonna be
like, but you have some idea, I guess it's that expectation VS reality thing.
[Leila] Do people tend to meet up to your expectations?
[R] They usually exceed them. Everyone I've met from across the mud have been
very cool people.
[L] Have you ever been really surprised by somebody that you've met through
the mud?
[R] In a good way, usually, I found out most of the people [I've met] are like
people I'd normally hang out with.
[L] Do you notice any particular common traits, or personality differences,
from their IC characters?
[R] They generally have a good sense of humor, and there's always a common
base to talk about, other than that, they're generally just like a normal
crowd [though] they do tend to 'say' socials.
[L] So although you got along because of the similar interest in the mud, do
you think that's what made them interesting to you, do you think that's what
makes you feel as though they're instant friends?
[R] It gives a reference to base a friendship off of I suppose. Considering I
don't know these people in any other context, I couldn't say one way or
another whether we even would have naturally met, but the majority of them are
people who I'd hang out with. In fact, the majority of them ARE people I hang
out with =P The people I've met tend to range from the computer illiterate to
the hacker, from the classical music listener to the metal head. I know these
people online and I have some established friendships with them already and
just like the face to face contact.
[L] Considering the "RP" nature of the medium, does it ruin the atmosphere and
mystery when you go back to mudding after meeting them?
[R] Not from where I stand, the character 'Rufus' and the player behind the
keyboard are identical, I don't put any faces on when I play him... Well,
maybe Rufus is a better pool player than Todd, but besides that, the only
mystery are my personal quirks of body language and the like. For the most
part I think, I don't try to hide who I am or play any other role while I'm on
as him. I even go by 'Rufus' in RL to many people who aren't in the mudding
community. I'm a 'gamer' at heart, rather than a real diehard RP'er, so I'm
not too hard to find while behind my other masks. I enjoy RP, but I think
eventually people get to know the real me before they meet me.

[Aracthabar] The idea of being friends with people I've never meet is kind of
odd to me, so I went to meet my friends that I hadn't met yet.
[L] Did that make it less 'odd'?
[A.] Yeah, but now I just wanna meet everyone.
[L] Was there anything particularly striking about the weekend?
[A] Meeting the people, which is what I went for. We all seemed to get along,
not that I expected any different. Almost no one looked like what I expected
them to, and there was a strangeness in the familiarity of all the people. You
could see where people's personality showed in their characters. But it was
great to finally meet all these old friends, almost like a reunion. It's odd,
in a good way, to be familiar with someone you've never met, it's like coming
home after a long absence, a very comfortable unfamiliarity.
[L] That's a very poetic way of putting it :) Final thoughts?
[A] LegendMeet '98: The Search for Atlanta will be held around the same time
next year in Atlanta, and I encourage everyone to go! Bombs not included.

[Joule] [I went to the MudMeet because] I enjoy the people here and I live in
town.
[Leila] Have you ever been surprised that someone on Legend was really
different from someone you met RL?
[J] Actually, more people are sorta how I imagine them than aren't. Tad was
JUST how I always pictured him and Ptah and Kristen and Todd were not
surprising....I'm always sorta amused at how quiet Sadist is RL. Course I've
known Raph and Kristen and Todd and Rick and Sherry a while now.
[L] So you think people are generally as they are on the mud?
[J] Hmmm, well I was a bit nervous at first. Course we brought the beer and
someone said that made the party loosen up some. And then we already know so
many [of the people there], I'm sure it was harder on those that knew no one.
I had a blast and I'm really glad people made the effort to come so we could
meet them :) I think the great thing about the mud is that it is an equalizer.
We have people with many different disabilities in the outside but here are
the same as everyone else.

[Rusalka] I figured this was the last chance to see that many Legendites in
one place and I'd regret it if I didn't.
[Leila] Anything surprise you?
[R] You go through this little shock period where nothing matches up. It made
my job here feel a little more real. I sometimes am embarrassed that I mud,
when I could be doing Important Things like going to bad Sylvester Stallone
movies.
[L] *giggle* I sometimes feel the same way.
[R] Meeting these people and seeing that they were refreshing "normal" people
was reassuring. Plus staying up till 3 am to listen to people argue about the
backstab skill :P Though I'm still not sure I care :P
[L] So are you glad you went?
[R] *ponder* I think so... I was really scared to go. But it worked out ok
and the Food was Good. Many people there were more quiet RL than on the game.
[L] I would be scared too, but I'll ask "why?"
[R] Well... I'm a little, shall we say, reserved anyway. It is scary to see
whether one really knows the other people.
[L] Some people I've spoken to said something along the lines of feeling
comfortable with mudders almost instantly because they were already friends.
You feel that way?
[R] There was an insto conversation topic and watching people talk about their
chars was fun :) It took less time than it might have with perfect strangers.
[L] Any last thoughts?
[R] That Mika is much scarier in RL :P Sweet dog, but smart, she slept with me
one night' :P

[Ryssa] Because it was close to where we live and I sort of started it.
[L] Was it as good as you expected?
[R] I had a great time!
[L] Was it strange meeting people who are already your friends?
[R] Not really, it was just putting an image on top of the personality....
Ptah and Rufus playing guitar.
[L] Had you ever met mud-people before?
[R] It was my first time.
[L] Did you feel close to the people that you met sort of instantly, or did it
take a while? I've heard some people say that it's strange how close you get
almost straight away.
[R] I felt like I already knew them so I guess it was instant....
[L] Any other words to say about the Mudmeet?
[R] Yea! when's the next one???

[Leila] It wasn't your first mud-meet was it?
[Charity] Actually it was. I'd already moved to Texas (in Houston at the time)
when the Washington DC Legendmeet was held.
[L] Did you have a good time?
[C] I did have a really good time, and I especially liked having all those new
faces around to distract Mika so she wouldn't slobber on me =) As far as I
know, people were pretty much the way they represent themselves on the mud.
[L] Do you ever go meet mudders without an organized group meet? Or is this a
really good chance to meet people that you wouldn't otherwise have a chance to
see?
[C] The one time I made a special trip to meet someone I knew from online, we
wound up moving in together and signing 'domestic partnership' papers... so I
don't think I'll need to repeat that =) I probably wouldn't have gotten to
meet people otherwise, so it was nice to have a legendmeet right next door.
[L] Do you meet other people through people you know from the mud, or is it a
sort of closed community?
[C] Well, through Joule I met her business partner, and the three of us baked
Christmas cookies together... I wouldn't say it's a 'closed community' as in
'outsiders aren't welcome'... it's more of an economic limitation for me, and
a time limitation for those of us who have full time jobs. I'm one of the
introvert mudders, I don't hang out with large groups of people in RL... and
Ptah and Kaige and I began mudding BECAUSE we were friends, not the other way
around.
[L] Were you surprised by anyone, not good/bad, but just surprised?
[C] Well when we first got there, conversation was very slow to start, and
someone (Ptah I think) suggested we bring in computers so everyone would talk
to each other... [But] then Spencer showed up with a cooler of beer, and
everyone got talkative after all =)
[L] Will you go to another one?
[C] If I had the means, I'd go to another one... LegendMeets aren't nearly as
weird as some of the conventions I've gone to *grin*

[Sandra] I thought it'd be fun to meet everyone.
[L] Was it?
[S.] Yeah, it was fun.
[L] Anyone surprise you by being different IRL?
[S] Yeah, a couple did, surprising but not in a bad way. Well, I cheated
anyway, I've talked to Todd on the phone.
[L] But is it different IRL?
[S] Hmm, yeah at first... But I think mostly because I'm a bit on the quiet
side RL.
[L] Did you feel comfortable as though with friends? Or did they feel like
strangers who became friends?
[S] I felt pretty comfortable, [but] it was strange meeting everyone at first.
[L] Did you feel sort of instantly close to people even though you hadn't met
them face-to face?
[S] I spent a good bit of time talking with Rufus and Point mostly. Point was
exactly like he is here *giggle*
[L] Glad you went?
[S] Yep! Even though it did take 22 hours to get there =P
[L] Would you go again? Or is once enough?
[S] Yeah I'd probably go again, just as long as its closer the next time =)

                      =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=                              
                              Them Level 50 Blues

Lately, I've been hearing from a lot of players (and not just the ones at
level 50) that they don't know what to do. They've done everything, been
everywhere, and can't think of any new challenges. In fact, they're feeling
quite bored.

This isn't that new. I've seen bored players back when the mud was limited
to some ten areas, and I'm seeing it now when the mud has over thirty. And
of course, this is all from my personal bias and observations. But still, I
think can offer some useful suggestions.

- Find new challenges.
    Not to over-generalize, but many of the "bored" players I see tend to be
    hard hitting, hard leveling folks. They battled their way to 50 with not
    one character but two, three, even more. They know all the best strategies
    for killing the mobs, which quests to do when, and so forth.

- So try going against type.
    Try a character that _doesn't_ care about leveling. Try one that would
    rather play around than get up to those heights. Sure, a lot of Legend's
    socializing takes place in groups. But try being less driven. Try playing
    a character that acts as the party's comedian, that often has to be
    reminded to wield his or her sword. Play a character that categorically
    refuses to kill Sidhe, or Englishmen, or little kids. Or screams in fright
    whenever someone casts a spell or fires a musket. In other words, try some
    role= playing.

And for those of you that already role play (but are bored)

- Play against type.
    If your characters all tend to get mud-married - play a celibate. Maybe
    even a nun, or a priest, or a shaman. Or a widow or widower that simply
    can't remarry. If you tend to play nice characters, try a not so nice one.
    Or vice versa. Remember that nice is different than good. People in the
    real world today do everything from rescuing orphans to fire bombing
    embassies because of what they believe to be "right." Or come up with a
    totally off the wall world view (but beware =96 psychotics tend to have
    limited role playing options). But whatever you do, go against the flow.
    Do what everyone else _isn't_ doing.

    Or even pretend that everything _isn't_ old hat to you. Pretend that you
    are a street savvy Londoner who's never seen (*gasp*) a sheep. Or the
    dunes of far off Egypt. How would you respond if everything were all new?
    Not only that, but promise yourself that you'll meet a new character every
    day.

And if you don't want to roleplay (or just want more suggestions)

- Give back.
    There a number of ways that players can contribute to Legend. Many players
    have run games, such as trivia, or scavenger hunts. Write articles for the
    Legendary Times. Start a role playing group. Become a Newbie Helper.
    Opportunities abound, and many more await creation.

Finally, if you've done everything and everything still *feels* *the* *same*

- Go on vacation.
    Take a couple hours out and go see a movie. Or read a novel. Or call up
    your nephews on the phone. Get a fresh prospective. Yes, as a player,
    there have been times when I was on Legend pretty constantly (can we say
    Spring Break?). And I've found that doing stuff "outside" of Legend
    enriched my experience of Legend. I got new ideas for characters to play,
    new ways to interact with the world. And frankly, sometimes we all need a
    break from anything that we do on a regular basis. It's easy to forget
    this precisely because for many of us (myself included), Legend is a
    "break" from our workaday world.

- Rusalka
             ________________________
            /                        \
        o O | Wonder what folks are   |
  `\|||/    | doing over at LegendMud?|
   (o o)    \________________________/
ooO_(_)_Ooo_____________________________________________________________________
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                                    LEGENDITES: 
              News and Information regarding the people of our world

                 What the BlueBird of Happiness Dropped on My Desk!
        
Recently, our trusty bluebird quietly nibbled seeds, at the Silver Branch Inn,
when screams and cries of outrage sounded through the town. Erica and Tancred
confronted Ulric and accused him of an undefined crime. Ulric insisted upon
his innocence, claiming that he was elsewhere with Sadie and Rimfrad at the
time. Suspicion abounded, when Rimfrad was asked to describe the innkeeper's
appearance at the establishment where he and Ulric had been drinking. He
startled the audience by asking, "Where is England?" Suspicion that Ulric paid
these witnesses was allayed, however, when it became clear that young Rimfrad
had recently taken a nasty blow to the head, causing him to suffer from
temporary memory blackouts. Furthermore, the two had been drinking heavily
that night. The case remains unsolved, as Ulric surprised the cheering
audience by rendering himself invisible and delivering a speech on justice and
truth soon to catch up with his enemies. He then gave a rather plausible
imitation of the evil wizard of Agrabah, and vanished with a Nyahahaa! and a
poof.

How the sneaky bird managed to go unobserved in the library, I really can't
say. Nonetheless, this is where she noticed T'Aleydras and Rummy, cheerfully
chatting. Much to the surprise of T'al, Rummy got down on one knee and asked,
"Will you marry me?" T'Al responded, "Yes!" with great delight, and so we are
pleased to announce the engagement of the happy couple! I suppose the
entranced pair were too involved in one another to notice the tiny reporter
and her microphone.

Rufus startled our tuneful tyke profusely by running through the mud in his
superhero costume, shouting something garbled about ice cream. We await the
further development of this curiously, and ask ourselves, "Which superhero?".

Our winged intruder sat on McDougan's shoulder for half an hour, whispering
sweet tweep!s into his ear (though our befuddled Scotsman doesn't seem to have
noticed) in an attempt to comfort him, as the dialectic mage cried out his
sorrow at his grandchild Herra's rejection. Shifting position to Herra's
shoulder, our bluebird quivered in fear as the young woman forwarded
instructions her family and acquaintances regarding what she thought they
should go and do with themselves. General belief among the McDougans and their
friends indicates that young Herra most likely is still suffering
after-effects of the evil spell Ulric has cast upon her. This spell caused her
to run away with Fraegis and become the mother of his child Cypher, all at a
time when Fraegis was still married to Keymistress. The spell recently
misfired, and caused Herra to chase Tancred all over Romania, in an attempt to
get him to marry her. The latest development, fortunately seems to indicate
that Herra is quickly recovering, and it should be fairly safe for men to go
near her again.

Frick and Frack have been observed by our small songstress on multiple
occasions giving away delicious gingerbread cakes to people fortunate enough
to run into them. We aren't quite sure if she's collecting news, or crumbs.

Llewellyn radiantly swore to sing the worldwide praises of Zodd at Mistress
Quickley's establishment. The Welsh bard had been compelled to sell his
instrument, and was now a bard without a song - reputedly worse than a knight
without a sword, a servant girl without a featherduster, or a squire without a
beating - when Zodd kindly procured a Spanish flamenco guitar. Our bluebird
fled when the two began doodling on guitars and violins, while discussing an
earlier jam session.

Winter recently survived a vicious attack upon her person. Our bluebird
watched with compassion and pity as she crawled and staggered through the
Gardens of Agrabah, and rejoiced with her when her force of will and patience
defeated the fire coursing through her veins.

Our winged busybird happened to be trying out Kleinstadt's famous sauerkraut
at the time Roland was challenged into fair joust by Ugh. Tancred and Mondain
observed that all happened in a fair and chivalrous manner. Perchance Ugh
should have used some of that magic Tancred berates him for using, because
once again, Roland came out the winner of the day. Maybe vicious looking
dinosaur bones are no match for solid German steel after all? Roland generally
seems to have had a good week, though, because our bluebird also overheard
Ulric complaining that the heroic knight had thwarted his plans and ploys as
well.

After stealing all those treats, I think the bluebird needs to go on a diet.
Speaking of diets our feathered friend has been joined in secrecy by the newly
anointed Diet, 'a secretive knight.'

Cultists, members of that secretive society so secret that not even its
members know what the 'S' is for, have been startled at the discovery that
Clan Angesley reputedly has attempted to infiltrate the Cult's ranks, by
sending in a young and unspoken of person to apply for membership. Our
bluebird who thinks the 'S' is code for celery', has not been able to divine
the identity of that young person, but then, they're all very secretive.

Our winged sneak was sick to its stomach recently, when it observed Huma
eating the intestines of Fraegis in public. Given the delicate matter of the
case, and the fact that our bluebird spent two hours at a very private place,
doing something very private and embarrassing, we have no information as to
the reason for this, nor the further developments of the case. We hope Fraegis
doesn't miss his organs too much, but then, vampires are notoriously hard to
get rid of, aren't they?

Erica has posted the happy announcement that she and Hastur are expecting
again, leading to delighted beams and applause among friends of the Mcdougan's
- and to some cruel snickers from enemies claiming the Scots learned a lesson
from Edward I of England, trying to breed their opponents out. By the way,
does anyone possess a complete list of McDougans and friends of the family, or
have we all lost track?

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                                LOVE LEGEND STYLE

Tired of getting married in your rusty armor? Tired of eating stale
sourdough bread at the reception? Well, wait no longer, because everything
that you need for your wedding extravaganza is at one, convenient, location.
Just a short hop up from Ringo's Flower Shop in the OOC, Muriel's Bridal
Boutique carries everything you need, from dresses and tuxes, to invitations
and thank you notes at low, everyday prices that even a newbie can afford.
Getting married was never so easy!

                                \|/ \|/ \|/
                                
                       A Scotch... er, Scottish Ceremony    

The church was decorated with many flowers, a cloth of the McDougan clan
colors, and a pile of tartan rags in the gutter... oh wait, that's McDougan.
Um, the church was decorated with flowers and a McDougan clan tartan in
preparation for the most recent McDougan wedding, that of Rana and BobaFett.
Sinbad, Huma, Moonshade, Kyla, T'Aleydras, Rana, Herra, XXX, Alaina, Herra,
Fenris, Gareth (the best man), and McDougan (father of the bride) attended.
Some concern was expressed over the absence of Hastur, who was apparently
having bladder surgery at the time.

Preparations for the knighting, after the wedding itself, were underway as the
bride and groom made some last-minute shopping choices for rings. BobaFett
decided on the more traditional ring of Mandalorian gold for his bride, while
she presented the groom with a drop of blood, a more personal if less
traditional, gift. Finally the ceremony began.

Lirra walked up to the alter and stood behind it. In the background, could be
heard the faint sound of bagpipes playing the traditional wedding march. The
best man took his place behind the very nervous groom. The bagpipes grew a
little louder as the marching warriors came forward. They parted to reveal the
beautiful young bride and the father of the bride, standing at the end of the
aisle.

The McDougan wished his daughter, 'Gsh luchk t'ye,' as he led her up to the
altar, staggering back and forth. Lirra gave BobaFett, the nervous groom, a
sympathetic look, and glanced at McDougan and Rana expectantly. She smiled
faintly as he led the bride to the alter. She nodded to the pair then started
to speak in a clear, calm voice, her accent faintly Scottish as well, despite
the fact she was born in Arabia. 'Today we are gathered to join two people in
matrimony.' She inclined her head to Rana and Bobafett and looked about,
asking... 'Who gives the bride, Rana, away this evening?' 'I weel,' McDougan
said, and his daughter smiled gently at him. BobaFett glared icily at
McDougan, so he explained sheepishly, 'Weel.. I be hrr fathrrr.' The groom
looked uneasy and fidgeted, however, the McDougan took no offense. He simply
ruffled his son-in-law-to-be's hair playfully, and the group relaxed. Lirra
inclined her head to McDougan, giving Bobafett a curious look as he glared at
the father of the bride. She spoke to McDougan, 'please lead her forward so
that her intended may take her hand.' The McDougan staggered up toward
BobaFett, Rana walking alongside him, apparently much calmer than her future
husband.

From somewhere nearby a warrior bellowed a warcry, and the groom yelled in
response, 'Stop it already we're trying to have a wedding!' As Lirra watched
with calm eyes, Rana came forward. She nodded her head, looking at the young
couple, and said, 'Please join your hands together and face each other.' The
bagpipes played rather lowly in the background, keeping up the spirit and
tempo of the wedding, as the couple faced each other and joined hands. Lirra
inclined her head in approval, smiled, and said, 'Marriage is a marvelous
thing, as it unites two people not through the heart, but spiritually. It is a
hard step to take, but well worth it in the end. Today, Bobafett and Rana wish
to join each other in holy matrimony, vowing unto one another their hearts and
souls.' She turned to Bobafett. 'Please repeat after me....' She paused a
moment, looking down on the alter to get her place, then looked back up to
Bobafett. The McDougan took this last moment to reassure himself, and
whispered to his daughter, 'Ye'll shtill vishit ye auld fathrrr, aye?'

The best man nodded reassuringly to the nervous groom as he repeated the vow,
stuttering slightly, 'I Bobafett, take thee Rana, to love and to hold, in
sickness and in health, forever and always, despite anything that may try to
divide us from one another. I pledge to you my heart and my soul, and my life
shall be forever more yours.' The faint sounds of the bagpipes could still be
heard, as the Scottish pipers continued to play a beautiful ballad of love.
Lirra smiled gently at Bobafett, then turned her gaze to Rana. 'I, Rana
McDougan, take thee Bobafett te be me husband, te love and honour, in whatever
strife life has in store fer us. If by my misfortune, I can make ye happy, I
will. If by my death, I can save ye, I will. If by my loving, I can keep ye, I
will. I am yours forever, my love...' vowed the bride.

Meanwhile, Huma fingered The Great Long Sword of William Wallace and grined at
Bobafett with calm, almost evil eyes. The groom seemed to be cringing in
terror, rather than listening to his bride, although McDougan was highly
amused. Lirra gave Huma a dark look, being the minister of this place. She
stated rather frankly, 'There will be no fighting at this wedding,' looking
very much like a formidable force. 'Prrrvided itch be a shuccsheshful weddin,
thatch be troo!' McDougan said to Lirra and winked. Huma said, 'There'll be no
leaving this wedding without my specific instructions my lady.'

Lirra inclined her head to Rana, beaming brightly to the bride while keeping
one eye on Huma the whole while, watching the culprit. She spoke out in a
loud, clear voice, 'The couple will now exchange their rings, which will
always...' 'Caushe proobleems,' McDougan interrupted. 'Be a symbol of their
love, binding them together through the ages of time, in a neverending cycle,'
finished Lirra. The couple exchanged rings, as Huma and T'Aleydras exchanged
threats. Gareth seemed to like the violent feel in the air, enjoying McDougan
weddings.

Lirra smiled faintly at the couple and looked about the room, her eyes
twinkling slightly, despite the tension in the air. Those bagpipers look like
some rather worthy combatants, maybe tis not wise to start a fight at such a
joyous occasion. McDougan joined in playing a nearly comprehensible wedding
march on a set of bagpipes. Once again Lirra spoke out in a loud and clear
voice, 'I now pronounce Rana and Bobafett, husband and wife. May their lives
be long, prosperous, and joyous always. You may kiss the bride now.' Huma
announced, 'There is another ceremony right after this one,' and confused much
of the wedding party. Herra inquired, 'There is? Whose?' while McDougan
wondered, 'Wi' who?' 'Not a wedding ceremony,' Huma clarified, 'Just a
Ceremony.' 'A ceremony for what?' Herra said completely boggled. 'A Knightin,'
Huma said. 'O' aye.. th' breengin o' Bobafett eent' th' McDoogansh,' McDougan
finally remembered

Rana ushered BobaFett towards Huma to be brought into the clan. Huma whipped
out a massive sword, and said to BobaFett, 'Kneel.' BobaFett knelt as Rana
looked lovingly at her husband. 'Today we initiate Bobafett into the Order Of
Knights of Scotland,' Huma said, whapping BobaFett across the back of the
head, and demanding, 'Ye be quiet for a bit.' BobaFett nodded solemnly. Huma
touched the sword to Bobafetts left shoulder, then gasped in distress, 'Sorry,
I should have used the flat of the sword. Can we get a bandage?' Rana gently
bandaged her husband's wounds, as McDougan noted, 'Itch a nishe, taditioonal,
painful sheremoony.' Huma moved the long sword to Bobafetts right side, and
whapped him across the back of the head again, ordering, 'Eyes down.' BobaFett
looked to the ground 'Uhmm you didn't need all that hair... besides it'll grow
back,' Huma said apologetically. Rana was deathly quiet, but her eyes betrayed
her amusement. Huma touched the sword to Bobafett's right shoulder. Huma said,
'Stand and be recognized Sir Bobafett of the Clan McDougan,' clinking his
sword against BobaFett's battle helmet. The new knight stood, as the McDougan
observed, 'Um.. thatch shword be sharp enoof t' cut metal...lik itch wash
butteer.'

Huma threw the great sword into the air, and a huge kestrel flew by and
grabbed it in midair. 'Very good sword,' Huma said. 'Boot I musht go. So
everyone DRINK AND PARTY.' Rusalka provided the traditional McDougan fare:
Scotch on the rocks, and Haggis. The father of the bride promised to acquire
the traditional McDougan kilt, but the groom seemed concerned only with his
helmet.

            'You put a ding in it!' BobaFett said exuberantly.
                   
                                \|/ \|/ \|/
                                
                             A Modern Marriage

    'We're all here to see the marriage of Morphine and Jeremy, so let's get
to it. Do you take Jeremy?' Flagg says to the bride.
    'Hell yeah!' the dark woman in her black trenchcoat responds.
    Flagg says to the groom, 'Do you take Morphine?'
    'She made me an offer I couldn't refuse, you bet I do!' Jeremy says to
Flagg.
    'Good!' Flagg says. 'Kiss the bride.'

The dark woman in her black trenchcoat launches herself across the room,
tackles Jeremy to the ground, and kisses him passionately. An arrogant youth
kisses a dark woman in a black trenchcoat passionately and ducks to the
ground. Jeremy kisses a dark woman in a black trenchcoat.

    'You told me too,' an arrogant youth complains to Flagg.
    
Ulric covers his eyes with his hands, while Flagg and Jeremy slap the arrogant
youth. Ulric slaps an arrogant youth, and an arrogant youth slaps himself -
OUCH!

    'Slapfest!' Jeremy says.
    'Kiss the bride and stuff,' Huma says.
    
A dark woman in a black trenchcoat kisses Jeremy tenderly. Jeremy snuggles up
to a dark woman in a black trenchcoat.

    'Now kill the groom,' Claudia says to Morphine.
    'Whyfor?'
    'She already did once,' Jeremy says to Claudia.
    'Because he's a man.'
    'I already killed him before!'
    Flagg says, 'That's alright, you can kill him again.'
    Claudia shrugs helplessly, 'Oh, well.. kill him for good measure.' 
    'Kill him to make sure he stays in line,' an arrogant youth says, 'Because
we know who wears the pants in your family.'
    Jeremy smirks, 'Yes, yes, kill me some more.'
    
    'Is it Jeremy Nepenthe?' Huma says.
    'Or Morphine Kane ?' Jeremy says.
    'I'm not changing my last name because of some man :P
    'Morphine Nepenthe-Kane?' Jeremy says.
    Morphine says to Jeremy, 'You have to change your last name.'
    'Jeremy Nepenthe-Kane,' Chimera says.
    'Nepenthe-Kane won't fit with my title.'
    'I beg your pardon?'
    Morphine says to Jeremy, 'You get to be a Nepenthe now!'
    'Why don't we just keep our names?'
    'Okies.' 
    'Yes, they will all know we are married anyhow. I expect the
congratulatory cards are pouring into my mailboxy already.'
    Chimera says, 'And the death threats, too.'
    
    Morphine asks Flagg, 'Do we get spiffy rings now?'
    'Um, sure,' Flagg says.
    Huma says, 'Jeremy be ready to get addicted to every drug known to man.'

A Marine whispers quietly to an arrogant youth, 'One of those Modern marriages.' 

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