Volume Three Issue Five

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.../________________/       running on         mud.aus.sig.net 9999
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http://mud.aus.sig.net/                       ftp://mud.aus.sig.net/pub
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VOLUME THREE, ISSUE FIVE                                 April 1, 1996
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                      ...:/:[ CONTENTS ]:\:...

                      -Announcement from Charity-
                           POLICY CHANGES
                            CODE UPDATE
                            ANNOUNCEMENTS
                              -Expies!-
                        -P-Kill Tourny Results-  
                           -Hera's New Desc-
                           -New LDL Address-
                           -New LT Address-
                              ARTICLES
                            -Did You Know?-
                       -A Brief History of Time-
                             SOCIAL EVENTS
                           -MacLaren Updates-
                            -Retirements-
                             -Weddings-     
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Please send your responses to articles to the Legendary Times address
at [email protected]. Letters to the editor are welcomed. 
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                        ANNOUNCEMENT FROM CHARITY

As of last weekend, I've retired from being an implementor. Some of you know
my recent personal history... I'd been unemployed and thus had lots of
spare time to be online and handle the day-to-day running of things. I'm
now working in a stained glass studio (some of you also know about my glass
hobby, and this job is a great chance to turn it into a career)... at any
rate I have no net access at work, and am too exhausted at the end of the
day to still give mudding or mud administrating the amount of time it'd
take. Since I'll only be here irregularly, I won't be in touch enough with
what's going on to be able to contribute to design decisions and such.
I'm still going to be maintaining my old areas and working on new areas, but
that will pretty much be the extent of my immortal contribution in the 
future.
I'll post about updates on my local boards when they occur, and will be
relying mainly on posts to those boards when I consider making changes. I'll
also be online as Warrl when I have time to play, so I won't be completely
gone. =) For desc requests you should now mudmail Ptah, and mail for the LT
should now go to [email protected]

If you have a question or problem with one of my areas, you should still
send mail to me, but otherwise please direct all questions and requests to
other gods.. you'll get a response MUCH faster that way, and pretty soon
they'll know much more about what's going on than I would.

 -Charity

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                            POLICY UPDATES

 - As of today, it is now policy for immortal characters to log off their 
immortals if they are playing a clanned mortal character.

 - Satsu's meeting in the OOC lounge was but the first of what we hope will 
become a regular series of player-immort meetings designed to increase 
communication. Here's a rundown:

 - Satsu is, aside from running the pkill tourney, also going to be working 
with clans to accomplish several objectives: get people more comfortable 
with pkill; work with those who expressed a desire for a code of good 
sportsmanship; work on getting all trans mobs and passwords revised, 
balanced, and in place; and in general act as clanned liaison.

 - Parrilyn is going to be running regular (probably biweekly) meetings in 
the OOC. These meetings will be for the purpose of gathering player input on 
features, bug reports, and for players to ask about progress on specific 
bugs, etc. Note that there is *NO* guarantee that we'll be able to implement 
any of the ideas that are proposed anytime soon, but we will of course 
listen and consider what we see.

 - Zandy has taken the position of player ombudsman. He is available to 
players to report grievances against the immortals and serve as their 
advocate in the case of disputes.

 - Rusalka is now the roleplay imm. She'll be working with players to 
promote roleplaying on Legend.

                 Look for more changes soon.

                          ************
                       
                          CODE UPDATE

- Flagg's new addition to Hell is in!! Look for new mobs (including an 
innkeeper and Cerebus, the canine guardian of Hell), as well as new 
quests. Rumor also has it that there's a bit of magic in the new part of 
Hell..... 

- Entrance now has a wait associated with it, as it was supposed to.

- Sniper has been similarly fixed.

- Gt now works again. In addition, you'll now get a message "you tell 
  your group" when you use gtells.
 
- Hallucinations are in! You'll see them when you get stunned. 
                          
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                           EXPIES!

The Expie Ballots are out! Be sure to vote for your favorite death trap!
Please also note that even though we forgot to put in Zandy's name, he 
_is_ eligible for nomination as "Best Immortal" and so forth. Likewise, the 
April Fool's Legend stuff is also eligible for the "best special effects 
category." And do let us know if you didn't get ballot so that we can send 
you one :)

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                   P-KILL TOURNEY REPORT

Due to the large number of folks registered, there was time for the team 
pkill competition (however, Satsu plans to hold one later :). The tourney 
took place in a paint ball arena specially constructed by Satsu and 
Kaige on a seperate mud site. Satsu reports the following results for the 
solo competition:

Heavyweight Division
Round 1: Jag sniped Howard, Numa beat Joule, Tarbash beat Squid, Lori beat
Brionna, Nett beat Fatale, Jehovah beat Uzrok, Dominic beat Desperado,
Pegasus beat Marya, Maurik beat Terrorspawn, Executor beat Manic, Tempus
beat Magda, Somar beat Phineas, Sharpe beat Toranthaz, and Kazoo beat Deanna.
And Justice beat Dial.

Round 2: Jag beat Numa, Justice drew a bye, Lori beat Nett, Dominic beat 
Jehovah, Pegasus beat Maurik, Executor beat Tempus, Somar drew a bye, and 
Kazoo advanced by default.

Round 3: Justice defaulted, Jag beat Kazoo, Lori beat Dominic, Executor 
beat Somar and Pegasus drew a bye.

Round 4: Lori beat Jag, and Executor beat Pegasus.

Final Round: Executor beat Lori.

That makes Executor the winner of the heavyweight tourney.

In Middleweight competition:

Round 1: Mistress defaulted, Landy defaulted, Swatch beat Crash, and Agyar
beat Blackbear.

Round 2: Agyar beat Swatch making him the Middleweight Champion.

In Lightweight Division:

Round 1: Keyzer beat Kelvin, Psytrac 

Round 2: Faramir drew a bye, Keyzer beat Psytrac.

Round 3: Keyzer beats Faramir making Keyzer the Lightweight Champion.

Grats folks!
Thanks to all who participated and I hope to have a team pkill tourney at 
an earlier time as it seemed to be inconvenient for a number of people.  
If you liked the  please send me mudmail or something as I need to know 
if this is something I would continue on a semi-regular basis or if it's 
something that people thought was 'swell but not worth the effort.'
-Satsu

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                      DESCRIPTION UPDATE

Hera recently became a Knight, and so has changed her long and short 
descriptions accordingly. She used to be "an enormous woman" but is now 
"Lady Hera" for her short. Her long once was "A majestic Greek beauty 
towers over you"; it now reads "A majestic Greek Knight towers over you."

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                            NEW LDL ADDRESS

As of March 31, 1996, the LDL has moved from [email protected] to 
[email protected]. Until today, using either address was valid. After midnight
tonight, you must send mail to [email protected] to post to the LDL. Of course,
LDL posts have been coming to you from zipnet for a couple of weeks, so 
you can simply just "reply" to other LDL messages, which is how 99% of LDL
mail comes in anyway :>

Happy mudding,
K'Mala

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                         NEW LT ADDRESS

Our new e-mail address is [email protected]. Please send all articles, 
rolep;ay logs and write-ups, advertisements, letters to the editor, and so 
forth to that address. 

Thanks!

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   _____	   
  /  _  \      DID YOU KNOW 	...that there's more to drink than just
 /__/ \  \     water on LegendMUD?
      /  /      
     /  /      The creators can choose from the following list of liquid
    /__/       types when creating drink containers and fountains:  
    __ 		   
   /  \	       water, beer, wine, ale, dark ale, whiskey, lemonade, 
   \__/	       firebreather, local specialty, black cherry kool-aid, 
               milk, tea, coffee, blood, salt water, and cola.                
   _____	   
  /  _  \      When you drink from fountains that contain liquids other
 /__/ \  \     than water you will get a message about what you are 
      /  /     drinking. Expect to see a few new fountains around taking
     /  /      advantage of this small code change.
    /__/	   
    __ 	       Also, when you fill a drink container from a fountain it
   /  \	       will fill with the liquid type contained by the fountain.
   \__/	       
                              
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                       A BRIEF HISTORY OF TIME

Many of our players have been somewhat lost because of the historical theme 
here at LegendMUD... so we thought it might be a good idea to locate a brief 
history of the world to present here in the Legendary Times to put the areas 
you play in in a little bit of context. In honor of April Fool's Day, here 
it is, a brief history of the world compiled by those experts on everything, 
the students of the United States: 8th grade through college level. Long 
live academia...

The inhabitants of Egypt were called mummies.  They lived in the Sarah 
Dessert and traveled by Camelot.  The climate of the Sarah is such that the 
inhabitants have to live elsewhere, so certain areas of the dessert are 
cultivated by irritation.  The Egyptians built the Pyramids in the shape of 
a huge  triangular cube.  The Pramids are a range of mountains between 
France and Spain.

    The Bible is full of interesting caricatures.  In the first book of the 
Bible, Guinesses, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree.  One of 
their children, Cain, asked "Am I my brother's son?"  God asked Abraham to 
sacrifice Issac on Mount Montezuma.  Jacob, son of Issac, stole his 
brother's birthmark. Jacob was a partiarch who brought up his twelve sons to 
be partiarchs, but they did not take to it.  One of Jacob's sons, Joseph, 
gave refuse to the Israelites.

    Pharaoh forced the Hebrew slaves to make bread without straw.  Moses led 
them to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made 
without any ingredients.  Afterwards, Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get 
the ten commandments.  David was a Hebrew king skilled at playing the liar. 
 He fought with the Philatelists, a race of people who lived in Biblical 
times. Solomon, one of David's sons, had 500 wives and 500 porcupines.

    Without the Greeks, we wouldn't have history.  The Greeks invented three 
kinds of columns - Corinthian, Doric and Ironic.  They also had myths.  A 
myth is a female moth.  One myth says that the mother of Achilles dipped him 
in the River Stynx until he became intolerable.  Achilles appears in "The 
Illiad", by Homer.  Homer also wrote the "Oddity", in which Penelope was the 
last hardship that Ulysses endured on his journey.  Actually, Homer was not 
written by Homer but by another man of that name.

    Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people 
advice. they killed him.  Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock.

    In the Olympic Games, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled the biscuits, and 
threw the java.  The reward to the victor was a coral wreath.  The 
government of Athen was democratic because the people took the law into 
their own hands. There were no wars in Greece, as the mountains were so high 
that they couldn't climb over to see what their neighbors were doing.  When 
they fought the Parisians,  the Greeks were outnumbered because the Persians 
had more men.

    Eventually, the Ramons conquered the Geeks.  History call people Romans 
because they never stayed in one place for very long.  At  Roman banquets, 
the guests wore garlic in their hair.  Julius Caesar extinguished himself on 
the battlefields of Gaul.  The Ides of March killed him because they thought 
he was going to be made king.  Nero was a cruel tyrany who would torture his 
poor subjects by playing the fiddle to them.

    Then came the Middle Ages.  King Alfred conquered the Dames, King Arthur 
lived in the Age of Shivery, King Harlod mustarded his troops before the 
Battle of Hastings, Joan of Arc was cannonized by George Bernard Shaw, and 
the victims of the Black Death grew boobs on their necks.  Finally, the 
Magna Carta provided that no free man should be hanged twice for the same 
offense.

    In midevil times most of the people were alliterate.  The greatest 
writer of the time was Chaucer, who wrote many poems and verse and also 
wrote literature.  Another tale tells of William Tell, who shot an arrow 
through an apple while standing on his son's head.

    The Renaissance was an age in which more individuals felt the value of 
their human being.  Martin Luther was nailed to the church door at 
Wittenberg for selling papal indulgences.  He died a horrible death, being 
excommunicated by a bull.  It was the painter Donatello's interest in the 
female nude that made him the father of the Renaissance.  It was an age of 
great inventions and discoveries.  Gutenberg invented the Bible.  Sir Walter 
Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes.  Another 
important invention was the circulation of blood.  Sir Francis Drake 
circumcised the world with a 100-foot clipper.

    The government of England was a limited mockery.  Henry VIII found 
walking difficult because he had an abbess on his knee.  Queen Elizabeth was 
the "Virgin Queen."  As a queen she was a success.  When Elizabeth exposed 
herself before her troops, they all shouted "hurrah."  Then her navy went 
out and defeated the Spanish Armadillo.

    The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespear. 
 Shakespear never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. 
 He lived in Windsor with his merry wives, writing tragedies, comedies and 
errors.  In one of Shakespear's famous plays, Hamlet rations out his 
situation by relieving himself in a long soliloquy.  In another, Lady 
Macbeth tries to convince Macbeth to kill the King by attacking his manhood. 
 Romeo and Juliet are an example of a heroic couplet.  Writing at the same 
time as Shakespear was Miquel Cervantes.  He wrote "Donkey Hote".  The next 
great author was John Milton. Milton wrote "Paradise Lost."  Then his wife 
dies and he wrote "Paradise Regained."

    During the Renaissance America began.  Christopher Columbus was a great 
navigator who discovered America while cursing about the Atlantic.  His 
ships were called the Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Fe.  Later the Pilgrims 
crossed the Ocean, and the was called the Pilgrim's Progress.  When they 
landed at Plymouth Rock, they were greeted by Indians, who came down the 
hill rolling their was hoops before them.  The Indian squabs carried 
porposies on their back.  Many of the Indian heroes were killed, along with 
their cabooses, which proved very fatal to them.  The winter of 1620 was a 
hard one for the settlers.  Many people died and many babies were born. 
 Captain John Smith was responsible for all this.


    One of the causes of the Revolutionary Wars was the English put tacks in 
their tea.  Also, the colonists would send their pacels through the post 
without stamps.  During the War, Red Coats and Paul Revere was throwing 
balls over stone walls.  The dogs were barking and the peacocks crowing. 
 Finally, the colonists won the War and no longer had to pay for taxis.

    Delegates from the original thirteen states formed the Contented 
Congress. Thomas Jefferson, a Virgin, and Benjamin Franklin were two singers 
of the Declaration of Independence.  Franklin had gone to Boston carrying 
all his clothes in his pocket and a loaf of bread under each arm.  He 
invented electricity by rubbing cats backwards and declared "a horse divided 
against itself cannot stand." Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead.

    George Washington married Matha Curtis and in due time became the Father 
of Our Country.  Them the Constitution of the United States was adopted to 
secure domestic hostility.  Under the Constitution the people enjoyed the 
right to keep bare arms.

    Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent.  Lincoln's mother 
died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own 
hands.  When Lincoln was President, he wore only a tall silk hat.  He said, 
"In onion there is strength."  Abraham Lincoln write the Gettysburg address 
while traveling from Washington to Gettysburg on the back of an envelope. 
 He also signed the Emasculation Proclamation, and the Fourteenth Amendment 
gave the ex-Negroes citizenship.  But the Clue Clux Clan would torcher and 
lynch the ex-Negroes and other innocent victims.  On the night of April 14, 
1865, Lincoln went to the theater and got shot in his seat by one of the 
actors in a moving picture show.  The believed assinator was John Wilkes 
Booth, a supposedly insane actor.  This ruined Booth's career.


Meanwhile in Europe, the enlightenment was a reasonable time.  Voltare 
invented electricity and also wrote a book called "Candy".  Gravity was 
invented by Issac Walton.  It is chiefly noticeable in the Autumn, when the 
apples are flaling off the trees.

   Bach was the most famous composer in the world, and so was Handel. 
 Handel was half German, half Italian and half English.  He was very large. 
 Bach died from 1750 to the present.  Beethoven wrote music even though he 
was deaf.  He was so deaf he wrote loud music.  He took long walks in the 
forest even when everyone was calling for him.  Beethoven expired in 1827 
and later died for
this.

    France was in a very serious state.  The French Revolution was 
accomplished before it happened.  The Marseillaise was the theme song of the 
French Revolution, and it catapulted into Napoleon.  During the Napoleonic 
Wars, the crowned heads of Europe were trembling in their shoes.  Then the 
Spanish gorrilas came down from the hills and nipped at Napoleon's flanks. 
 Napoleon became ill with bladder problems and was very tense and 
unrestrained.  He wanted an heir to inheret his power, but since Josephine 
was a baroness, she couldn't bear him any children.

   The sun never set on the British Empire because the British Empire is in 
the East and the sun sets in the West.  Queen Victoria was the longest 
queen. She sat on a thorn for 63 years.  He reclining years and finally the 
end of her life were exemplatory of a great personality.  Her death was the 
final event which ended her reign.

    The nineteenth century was a time of many great inventions and thoughts. 
The invention of the steamboat caused a network of rivers to spring up. 
 Cyrus McCormick invented the McCormick Raper, which did the work of a 
hundred men. Samuel Morse invented a code for telepathy.  Louis Pastuer 
discovered a cure for rabbis.  Charles Darwin was a naturailst who wrote the 
"Organ of the Species".  Madman Curie discovered radium.  And Karl Marx 
became one of the Marx Brothers.

    The First World War, cause by the assignation of the Arch-Duck by a 
surf, ushered in a new error in the anals of human history.

 --compiled by Richard Lederer, St. Paul's School

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            /                        \
        o O | Wonder what folks are   |
  `\|||/    | doing over at LegendMud?|
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Rumors have it that a war is brewing 'twixt the Secretives and the Order 
of the Scroll...as well as between the Order and the Coven (maybe it has 
something to do with Sharpe and Justice's announced wedding?)...we've 
also heard that clan GM's recently met to discuss pk policies and clan 
relations...

                         ********

Clan MacLaren seems pretty shaken up lately. In the past few weeks, a 
"false" MacLaren has been claiming kinship with the clan, a claim which 
was publically refuted by the returned Kendrik....Kendrik has returned? 
Indeed! Read on, gentle reader! Not only has he returned, but he's been 
working rather hard at lining up some suitors for a not altogether happy 
Northstar (apparently, she'd prefer to have more control over the selection 
process)...so far, the suitor list includes Malorn, Arturos, Angst, and 
Pol, who reportedly already cleared Hell as part of his quest. Landy 
recently got booted out of the MacLarens, though not before proposing 
marriage to Fatale, who fist accepted, then broke it off (rumor has it 
that she desired a different MacLaren member..). Frodo got turned into a 
vampire after one two many visit to London...

                             ********

We've had a rather long list of retirees/permadeaths in the past few....Tao 
has retired...Kretch has retired...Magda has retired...Alistaire has 
retired...Sabella was permakilled...eesh! Maybe we need a Legend cemetary!

                             ********

Eimer and Dial recently got married..Northstar stood up for them and 
Parrilyn presided (reports indicate that it was a "lovely" ceremony :) 
Wedding bells were also heard for Killer and Sandra. Rusalka performed 
the druidic ceremony, which was held in a mysty bit of Ireland...
 
                            *********

Agrippa seems to be back, and has been leaving all sorts of posts 
announcing his undying love for the (married) Mitra. No response from her 
yet, though, so far as we've heard. We did hear that Mitra got 
accidentally listed under the "Best GM" category for the Expies ballot 
(She sent us a note saying that it was "awfully flattering" but that "you 
should vote for Toranthaz instead").

                            \|/ \|/ \|/

Alistaire, druid of Lohr, recently made the following announcement to 
legendary folk:

People of legend, may i have your attention? It was 16 years ago when I 
was green behind the ears, a child of Ireland, and a child of nature.
On my travels I came upon someone named Zen, whose guidance and teachings 
I took to heart as she taught me the ways of both the warrior and of the 
druid. As most of you know, I think I got the druid stuff down, the
warrior stuff just never came... *shrug* For many years I travelled in 
the company of good friends, allies... Malorn, Satsu, Gerry, to name a 
few... and of course, my dear departed wife, Isobel whom forever touched 
my heart. It was that death that made me seek out another finding as a
true druid, and I found then the druids of Lohr, and within their ranks I 
grew to the highest position. It is now my choice that Gerry Cowan shall 
become the Archdruid of Lohr, and uphold its beliefs and teaching. I have 
come to an impass in my life... one where i need to move on.  Know in my 
heart that all I have crossed I have remembered dearly. My soul will 
forever continue to live in the hearts and the souls of the trees, the 
animals, and the people of Ireland.

And with that, my friends, I bid you all a good life, a good day, and may 
your visions become real and your reality lie within the magic inherant 
in the nature of this vast and strange world. 

He bowed. The following info message then appeared:

[Info]: Alistaire killed by a druid of Lohr, as a sacrifice and service 
in the name of the dieties of nature.
[Info]: Alistaire is permanently DEAD

                            \|/ \|/ \|/


We now bring you the Legendary Times exclusive account of Kendrik's 
re-emergence into Legend:

Yet again, Tad was blinking in astonishment at the sight of his late 
father. He sighed and wondered what his father's ghost had to say this 
time...
 "I cans see yu... how comes I cannae touch you?" Tad asked Kendrik.
 "Cause I am dead child," the shade replied. Tad burst into tears.
 "But e'en ifn yu trieded real hard?" Tad continued, sniffing sadly.
 Tad's Uncle Darby leaned close to comfort the lad. "He's a shade now, 
 child..." Darby explauned.
 "The Dark lord finally got me," the shade moaned. It suddenly seemed to 
  think of something.
 "Mebbe," Tad asked it, "ifn Oncle Darby Magickd yu?"
 The ectoplasm of the shade gathered in a look of thoughtful 
concentration. "Mebbe..." it moaned... "I might not need Darby." It 
concentrated some more.
 Darby sighed and noted that he wasn't quite that good with his magic.
 Tad sniffs sadly.
 Kendrik's ghost furrowed its brow
 Tad tried to make his Da' real by b'lievin, while Darby chanted a spell 
to aid his late brother.
 Suddenly, the ghost screamed in agony as its (his?) soul flickered between 
realities. Slowly, the ectoplasm became flesh...having fought his way out 
of the depths, the newly emerged Kendrik collapsed.
 
 After a few silent moments, Tad tentatively reached out a hand 
tentatively to touch his Da'. At the same time, Kendrik tried to touch 
his Tad, and touched flesh for the first time in....well, a very long time.
Tad cried on Kendrik's shoulder and they hugged, to the utter amazement 
of Darby.
 "DA'!" Tad spoke in a melancholy tone..."Yu's REAL!"
 "That I am son, love brought me back," Kendrik answered.
 Meanwhile, Darby had decided to test Kendrik's reality by tackling him 
to the ground. It worked. Darby laughed in astonishment.
 "I live once again," announced Kendrik.
 "I loves yu, Da!" Tad happily told him.
 "I love you too Tad,' Kendrik answered. He turned to Darby, saying "And 
you too brother."
 "Yu's... 'live?" Tad asked, still incredulous.
 Darby gasped once more at Kendrik. "You're back, lad!" Darby exclaimed.
 Kendrik agreed. "I am back."
 "Alive and well, thirsty too," he continued, wondering whether scotch 
would taste the same as he remembered.
 Tad grabbed hold of his Da's leg and clung to it tightly.
 Kendrik suddenly looked very, very overwhelemed. He quietly fainted.
 Tad caught his DA'. Looking worriedly at Darby, he asked "He isnae...Ded? 
 'gain?'
 Guessing what remedy would be needed, Darby conjured a Scotch on the 
rocks, whereupon Kendrik abrubtly woke up and grabbed it, quaffing it 
down in one gulp.
 "I thotted I hadded losted yu 'gain!" plaintivlely told his father.
 Tad wiped a few tears from his eyes.
 "Ye just have to be able to brew a poof-not-dead potion, laddie..." Darby 
explained to his nephew.
 "Nay, Darby just had to speak my language," Kendrik informed his son.
 Kendrik ruffled Darby's hair playfully.    
 Kendrik suddenly realized that he was "nekkid," and the party 
hurridly departed to search out some spare clothes from Tad and Darby's 
wardrobes. As they left, one could hear Tad exacting a promise from Kendrik 
that "yu won ne'er leave 'gain."

                          \|/ \|/ \|/

My apologies to all those whose' rp events I've left out. Due to a 
number of recent RL commitments, I havn't been around as much as I 
usually am, and so have missed seeing or hearing about a number of 
events. Please note that we welcome all send-in accounts from 
players..basically, it's up to you all to make sure that your name 
is in the LT. I'd also be interested in hearing from any who are 
interested in reporting rp events for the LT in a more regular fashion 
(do note that we need either unbiased stories, or ones that freely admit 
it :). We also welcome articles on various and sundry Legendary topics.
                    
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 Legendary Times is put out by the gods of LegendMUD. Please send all
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inclusion in the next edition. We, however, reserve the right to moderate 
this discussion, and may object to some submissions. If you feel we have 
wrongly omitted one of your messages, please talk to Rusalka online or 
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